Sunday, June 30, 2013

Day 23, sorry I missed a day.

   Sorry I missed a day, my sister was in town from Texas and she is newly engaged so the day was filled with wedding stuff.  Yeah. Okay back to the face. My is looking really good, I have 2-3 actual pimples that are healing and have nothing to do with the rosacea, I'm just lucky like that and get pimples just because. The dry skin is starting to go away, I haven't done anything special but it's starting to go away. When I think about it I put some shea butter on it, but that is it. I did notice that my face flushed last night while eating crawfish, that sucked but I sure as hell am not giving up crawfish. First time I have flushed in a few days so I thought I would mention it.

   I have to say, I am STILL amazed that my face looks just as good now by using oils and natural products as it did when I was taking expensive meds that are not good for you anyway. I am actually confident enough with my face again that I am willing to go out in public with no makeup again. I have never been one of those girls that wears makeup to the store, so it's nice that I can go back to being mostly makeup free. I was going to do closeups of the dry scaly skin, but it's gone. The texture is improving which is good and I noticed that the large pores that I have had on my nose since I hit puberty are starting to get smaller. Nice bonus. Okay so on to the pictures.

Day 23









Saturday, June 29, 2013

Day 21, Look at that I put on a shirt!

   Day 21, not much has changed. Sorry if this is kinda boring but I like that my face is becoming kind of boring. Still just using the tea tree oil/argan oil 50/50 mix, I will probably pick one day a week and due the nu-stock/coconut oil mixture just to make sure things stay at bay and do the borax soak every second or third day. I have been drinking the borax mixture everyday for the last 3 days, I don't seem to be having any negative side effects and I can't taste it so why not.

   My face is REALLY dry still despite the honey mask and the pure shea butter I have been putting on. I think this is making my face itch now and not the mites. It's a different itch, the mites you can actually feel moving and it's really gross. I still get that every once and I while and when I do I hit that spot with a dab of tea tree oil and laugh an evil laugh as they die. Boowawahahahahaha. Yeah, kinda like that. So now I just have to find a balance to keeping the mites under control and keeping my face from cracking like the desert landscape. It's not so obvious unless you are right in my face like I am in the mirror all the time or if I am wearing makeup which I don't do a whole lot. So yeah, that is about it for now. Picture time! Oh and I was even nice enough to put on a shirt for you this time. Feeling fancy.....your welcome. One last thing, I haven't been doing close ups because there really isn't anything to see like the bazillions of p&p before but tomorrow when the sun is back I will try to get close ups so you can see how everything looks and how dry my skin is. Any tips on helping with that would be much appreciated!

Day 21






Thursday, June 27, 2013

Day 20...and I'm feeling good.

   So it is now day 20 on my journey. I feel like it has been so much longer than that, it has been such an up and down 20 days. I haven't done the nu-stock in a few days, I think it is so harsh it isn't something I can do daily, maybe a once a week thing. I mean it REALLY does a big kill when you use it so it is worth it but it really is drying. Last night my face was so dry I just felt like I had this layer of dry dead skin that nothing was penetrating so I did an exfoliate with honey. So much better now, my face feels soft and smooth, such a nice change.

   Last night I did another borax bath, I soaked for about 20 minutes. My whole body loves it, even my dry feet are softer, it's pretty amazing stuff. I didn't want to mention this until I was sure I was going to stick with it but the last two days I have been doing the internal borax also. You can read more about it here. I don't recommend anyone doing anything that I am doing, I am just telling you what I do and documenting MY results. Also just because I have a particular result doesn't mean you will have the same results.

  Basically I have mixing 1/8th teaspoon of borax with a liter of water and sipping it throughout the day/night. It seems like such a little amount that it wouldn't do anything but I haven't been wanting to scratch my skin off so that is good. I can't taste it and I haven't had any other issues with it so far so I am sticking with it. I swear I am throwing everything I can find at these mites. Tea tree oil, nu-stock, honey, borax, everything lol. And just so people don't think I see something and just do it I do a LOT of reading, research and contemplating before trying any of these things and I suggest you do the same. Okay now on to the pictures.

These pictures are pretty accurate to color and everything. I am making horrible faces because the sun is shining right on face and in my eyes. But with all that natural light comes the most accurate pictures. I have one pimple under my nose that is healing and everything else that you see is drying up and healing. Nothing new and active, I just wish my texture would improve but I am sure it will over time and after everything heals completely.

Day 20










Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Day 19

   So last night I put on the argan oil/tea tree oil mixture before I left for work. I am giving my face a little break from the Nu-stock, my face seemed to have a slight pink ting all over and it was super drying and my face just needed a break. Okay back to last night, so I brought my oil with me to work and whenever I felt one moving making me insane I put some oil on it.

   My face is much paler than it was but it is still pink, especially on my cheeks but  I think a lot of that is broken capillaries that I need to have zapped again. My forehead is still covered in a bazillion bumps that itch like crazy and I have gotten a bunch behind my ears that itch too. Another reason I am giving my face a break from the nu-stock is I can tell that the chemicals were burning my skin a little because I looked like a wearing a slight pink mask and my skin was pale around my eyes. It isn't enough for anyone else to notice but I could.

   Did I mention my forehead itches like crazy? Later today I am going to take a borax soak in the tub, but for now pictures. I am not going to do the up close ones because there is nothing to see. I don't have any new pustules just a pimple, well on my face anyways. I am starting to get some on my chest, hence the borax bath. So weird that I can say I have no new pustule. On to the pictures, sorry I look like I am in pain, the sun was shining in my eyes.

Day 19









Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Day 18. Make it stop

   Working all night gave me the pleasure of feeling them at their most active time instead of sleeping through it. Let me tell you, I am surprised I still have a face I wanted to scratch it off so bad. I am trying really hard not to scratch so I kind of pat instead which turned into smacking. So basically all night I was beating the shit out of myself. I sure hope this couple doesn't have a nanny cam or they are going to think I am insane. I could feel them on my face, and on my head the worst but they are now moving down to my chest and back. I would take pictures of my chest to show you the pustules popping up there but I am trying to keep this PG 13 except for language.

   Have you ever seen that show 1,000 ways to die? If not the premise of the show is reenactments of stupid shit people did that killed them. Snorted ants, tapeworm diet, college age guys participating in stupid bets or pranks, you get the drift. Well I have a feeling I am going to end up on this show when I die trying to figure out a way to rid my body of these damn mites. They are driving me INSANE. So because they are driving me insane I have resorted to putting animal mange medicine on my face, bathing in laundry detergent and now I am about to start drinking laundry detergent because the topical shit isn't cutting it, and if I really have to I will be going for the horse dewormer next. And this my friends, is how I am going to end up on that stupid show 1,000 ways to die.

   Okay I'm tired, on to the pictures and off to bed. Sorry if they are not THAT accurate I just got out the shower so I'm a little more flushed than normal. OH I almost forgot, just a FYI if you are treating your lashes with tto and you accidentally use the 50/50 bottle instead of the 1:8 bottle and your eyelids feel like they are frying first, DON'T PUT WATER ON THEM, it only makes it worse, but do coat them in coconut oil and it makes them stop burning immediately. Not that this has happened to me or anything, just something I heard somewhere.

Day 18





















Ahhhhhhh

My face is itching like crazy! Usually I am asleep so maybe it's not this bad or maybe the oils I put on kills them but they are active and driving me nuts! I feel like a dog with fleas. It's driving me insane! My eyes are gritty and dry and other places are starting to itch like my chest. I think I am going to do a borax soak when I get home. I just don't know how I can treat my face at night when I am at work. I can't keep putting on oils and nu-stock all night at work. Hmmm. Any suggestions?

Monday, June 24, 2013

Nightly wrap up

   So my face has remained pustule free all day and pretty pale for me. Besides the peeling dryness and bumpy texture it looks pretty close to normal. It is dry and scaly around my mouth where I had the most p&p and my forehead is still covered in a million bumps but they are going down.

   I am starting a new job tonight so I am putting on my nu-stock now so it will soak in before I leave. Also I did nu-stock from my eyes down and tto on my forehead just in case my forehead is reacting to the nu-stock.  Okay I'm out.

   One last thing, I have noticed that other places on my body are starting to itch and I am going to have to really get serious with the borax baths. 

Day 17 HOLY CHIT!

   This morning I was woken by someone knocking on my door, now if you have a face that looks and acts like mine you know the state of panic and horror I was in having to answer the door without having looked in the mirror first. I was trying really hard to look down cover my face with my hair, it was ridiculous. So of course as soon as they left I ran to the mirror to see how bad I scared him and I was shocked.

   My face again had not a single pustule, not one AND my face was almost normal colored. It has a slight pink tinge but I think that is because of the sulfur and maybe I need to dilute it a little more. The texture on my face is starting to smooth out, it's crazy. I don't want to get my hopes up just to wake up with it red and swollen and full of pustules again so I am just going to enjoy it day by day and be happy with how it looks today.

   One thing is my face does still itch, I think it is because I need to dilute the sulfur more still. I itch the worst behind and right in front of my ears, my forehead and the back of my neck. Also my face is dry and scaly but a little argan oil will fix that up. It really is sad that my whole mood for the day if effected by how my face looks in the mirror but it does. If I can keep it heading in this direction I should be in a pretty good mood for a while. Okay, on to the pictures.

Day 17














Nightly wrap up.

   Today was pretty uneventful which is awesome. I didn't flush, I didn't get any new pustules nothing. My skin has been a bit dry but that is to be expected. Shit since these little buggers eat oil on your skin maybe I can starve them to death. My forehead, ears, behind ears and scalp have been REALLY itchy but that is about it. It's not so much of the crawly itch, just itchy.

   My skin never reacted to the test patch I did on my forearm so I guess I am good to keep using the nu-stock and that is just about a million dead mites on my forehead and not hives or anything. It's insane how many bumps I have on my face, my mom was over and she was like "all of those bumps are dead mites!, No wonder, you were just covered in them!" So gross. So it looks like I just have a REALLY bad infestation.

   Skin wise today I washed my face with tto soap when I got home to take off the makeup I put on when I ran to the store, I put on some pure argan oil after cause my face was super dry. I read a little bit about the borax treatment and I just don't think the tto shampoo and soap are strong enough to kill the mites so I got some borax and hydrogen peroxide at the store and made a bath with it and soaked in it for about 20 minutes. I did 1 1/2 cups of borax and 1 cup of peroxide and I soaked on my back for a bit, then on my belly then side to side being sure to let it get into my ears and kept dunking my face and my scalp. When I was done I didn't rinse or towel dry, I got in front of my fan and air dried. I might do this every other day or every 3 days just to make sure I am really getting everywhere. I keep reading stories of people chasing these things from one spot on their body to another and I don't want to do that. I just want them gone. Okay, so I am about to go put on my coconut oil nu-stock night mask, I will update when I wake up. Night.

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Day 16 I feel like my face is f*cking with me


   Seriously, I feel like it is playing with my emotions. Like it does well and then BAM bad day just to fuck with me and then goes back to doing well. So, ready for my theory? I did the nu-stock with the coconut oil on Thursday night and was fine, I think that did a MASSIVE extermination. Friday I was fine because my body wasn't reacting to the dead mites yet, I tried to mix the nu-stock with the argan oil but the argan oil isn't a strong enough oil to counteract how strong the nu-stock is and that is why it started to burn and I took it off. Also the argan absorbs quicker and better than coconut oil so I think it drew it deeper into my skin and more of it than the coconut oil. Just glad I took it off. But yesterday all of the mites started to breakdown and that is what our body reacts to so that is why my face looked like hell. It was reacting to the overload of hundreds of dead mites.

   So last night I diluted the nu-stock even further with coconut oil and applied it to my entire face and below and behind my ears because I had been itchy there too lately, like they are making a run for it. I figured my face was already beet red and broke out, why stop now, just push through it.

   Today I woke up and I didn't have a single pustule. Not one. My face is still redish but not like yesterday and my forehead is COVERED in bumps (well now my whole face is) but no pustule. Now let me explain what I define as pustule, a pustule to me is a raised lesion with a white head on it that looks like it needs so be popped, there are shallower than pimples and usually go away once they have been popped. They usually show up and leave withing 24 hours. It's like it's a toxin that is expelled through my skin and when it's expelled it's gone, unlike a pimple which is a clogged pore that likes to get big and hang around.

   So my forehead has hundreds of these tiny bumps all over it and I can't decide if they are dead mites or an allergic reaction to the nu-stock. I am going to do a test patch on my forearm to see how my sink reacts to the mixture I used last night. I have to say my face does itch like crazy. But if the nu-stock can kill off that many mites at once, I will keep using it at least once a week to knock these suckers out. Also I am going to do a borax bath later to treat the rest of my body. Okay I have a lot of pictures today, full face, close ups and a comparison with yesterday so you can see how insane my skin is. The forehead ones you can't really see how many bumps there are. Right now the texture of my skin is fucked.  P.S. Sorry for the serial killer eyes.

Day 16



















   












End of the day rant.

   So, today sucked. I am just really bummed out and depressed and just wanted to lay in bed and cry but I didn't get to do that. I had to go drop a placenta off to a client (I do placenta encapsulation) and she had a house full of people. I just wanted to hide my face but she wanted to invite me in to see the baby and meet everyone. It was really nice of her but did she not see my strawberry face and that I needed to be hidden from public! On my way home I remembered I need to go to Walmart to pick up my meds. Shit, there is no way to walk into a Walmart anywhere in the country and not see someone you know. I could go to one in Alaska and see someone I know. It's ridiculous. Of course when I get there its not ready so I have to sit and wait. I try to sink and disappear but it doesn't happen. For some reason the other people there wanted to engage me in conversation. People! Again, can you not see my strawberry face and the slouching and wanting to disappear! LEAVE ME ALONE. So I finally get home and my mother, aunt, gmaw and niece show up..... Can I PLEASE just go bury my head under a pillow and hide people! Apparently not. So by this point I am upset, stressed, and at my breaking point when my mother wants computer lessons and my niece wants to watch a movie that I can't find. And then because I am snapping I am the mean, bitchy person. Also for all of the people that asked me today (and there were more than a few) If your face looked like this do you THINK it would hurt?! YES! Yes, if fucking hurts. It BURNS! Just a slight change in temperature BURNS and I am living in the swamp where it is 70 or below in a building and about 100 outside with 100% humidity. You LOOKING at...that hurts. Yes I have been to a doctor, no it is not contagious, yes I think I should put something on it. Thank god you were here for those suggestions because I would have never thought of that. Oh and the "If you think your face hurts, well it's killing me jokes" are old. Try something new. Goodnight.

P.S. My forehead, that never, ever gets bumps is covered in them. I wish you could see how bad in the picture but oh well











Saturday, June 22, 2013

Day 15, this is really bad

   So I knew it would get worse, I never thought it would get this bad. My face possible looks the worst it ever has, EVER. I don't know if it was the nu-stock or a big die off of mites or what but it is super bad. My face looks like a strawberry, it's slightly swollen, it hurts and I woke up to about 100 tiny pustules, to many to count. I was in shock when I looked in the mirror this morning. I mean I guess it's a good thing that I managed to kill off that many mites but damn, I am not leaving my house unless I HAVE to. I usually on show the close ups but today I am going to show close ups and my full face so you can get the full effect. That's all I can say right now. I am going to go cry now. Warning you may not want to look at these pictures.

*Update to original. Please do a test patch to see how you react to Nu-Stock before using it, I do end up having an unpleasant response to it (as you can see here) and I'm not sure if it was an allergic reaction or if my skin is just really sensitive. I would recommend putting a tiny bit either on your forearm or under your jawline first and waiting at least 2 days to see how you react before putting it on your entire face.**

Day 15














Friday, June 21, 2013

It's amazing how a 5 year old can bum you out.

   So my face was pretty red today, I woke up flushed and it stayed pretty persistent all day. I'm not sure if it was the nu-stock or if it's that 2-3 week  backslide you are suppose to go through or what but it sucks. My face just kept popping up with more pustules during the day, which is awesome since I had a job interview today. My makeup just made the red look purple. Lucky me! Then my niece is spending the night and she looks at me after her bath and says "Nanny, why is your face always so red and have pimples?" She's 5 so she is still learning what is okay to ask and not. My mom told her that isn't nice to ask that, and her innocence she was just like "well no one else has a red face or that many pimples, I was just asking." Yeah.

   So that has put me in such a great state of mind. My family likes to tell me you can't tell and it's not that red or noticeable. Then you bring a honest 5 year old around and get the truth. Anyways, tonight I was going to do the nu-stock again but with argan oil since it absorbs quicker and I like it but when I mixed it up and put it on it started to burn so I washed my face right away. So now my face is even a little more red, yippee, so I just put on some argan and tto and now I am off to bed. Night

Nu-stock update

   Okay, so I woke up to my face feeling flushed. Not sure what that is about, but it is warm to the touch and it is flushed in areas I don't usually flush. Alright let me back up to last night. So last night I tried the nu-stock for the first time, scroll back a post and read my first thoughts on texture, smell etc.. So after I put it on I could tell it was working because I could feel the little buggers trying to make a run for it. My face kept itching, but not in a I think I am breaking out in hives way, like the mites are dying way. Also I think this stuff gets into your bloodstream cause it was like I could taste is a little in the back of my throat. The itching did drive me a bit nuts and made it hard to sleep and actually I am a bit itchy right now.

   So when I woke up this morning I had about 20 tiny little pustules, and one bigger one. I think the bigger ones are maybe like little nest of them. You can't even see where the ones I had yesterday were, they come and go so quick. So that is a good and bad thing, it feels like a setback, but I think it's just the new ones hatching and being killed off, and it is following that timeline pretty well so I am just going to go with it and call it progress. Its still mentally and emotionally hard to look in the mirror and see your face covered in tiny little bumps and flushing and think of it as progress when 2 days ago you were just slightly pink and had one bump. I am trying really hard to not let it get me down.

   So on the nu-stock bottle is says apply every 3 days, so I think I will use it every 3 days and use the tto in between. I don't want to over do it with the nu-stock. Okay picture time.

**Update to original post. Please do a test patch to see how you react to Nu-Stock before using it, I do end up having an unpleasant response to it and I'm not sure if it was an allergic reaction or if my skin is just really sensitive. I would recommend putting a tiny bit either on your forearm or under your jawline first and waiting at least 2 days to see how you react before putting it on your entire face.**

Day 14









Nu-stock (Please read warning at the bottom of the post)

   So my Nu-stock* came in today and I think I am going to try it out. I am making a batch of 1 tbsp of coconut oil, 1 tbsp of nu-stock and about 7 drops tto. First the bottle is a LOT bigger than I thought it would be, it smells medical, and like pine scented cleaner. Not good but not horribly bad like I was expecting, tolerable. Also it is a lot thinner than I expected, more watery. I thought it would be more pasty like toothpaste or like neosporin, not liquid, I guess because of the tube it comes in I thought it would be thick like lotion or something. Being thin did make it a lot easier to mix it with the coconut oil once I melted the oil. I also made sure I shook the tube really well first to make sure everything mixed well. It's a weird yellow color, another thing I didn't expect, and I wondered if it would leave my skin yellow but it didn't. I used a q-tip and applied it to my entire face, it has a little bit of a gritty feeling to it but not much. The color dissipated right away and it's been about 5 minutes and it is starting to absorb. Coconut oil always takes a bit to absorb, I will give it about 30 minutes then blot my face with a tissue and go to bed. It didn't burn or sting or anything so that is a good sign. I will update the rest tomorrow I guess. Night!

**Update to original post. Please do a test patch to see how you react to Nu-Stock before using it, I do end up having an unpleasant response to it and I'm not sure if it was an allergic reaction or if my skin is just really sensitive. I would recommend putting a tiny bit either on your forearm or under your jawline first and waiting at least 2 days to see how you react before putting it on your entire face.**



Thursday, June 20, 2013

Day 13...I knew this would happen.

   So I didn't come to the demodex conclusion or treatment out of the blue, I did a lot of read and a lot of research most of it here on a rosacea forum. While reading and researching I pretty much self diagnosed demodex mites as being my main culprit. I had all of the signs, the pustules, the redness, the itching, acne medicine not working a lot of different things. So when I figured out that was my problem next was to see what treatment options I had and see how they worked for different people. Some people had used borax, some had used sulfur, some had used a cream you order from over seas called ZZ cream or Zhongzhou Zinc Oxide and last some had used tea tree oil.

   While trying to chose which treatment to follow I read a couple of threads that people wrote chronicling their treatments and their ups and downs, (like I am doing here but without many pictures) to help decided which treatment I would follow. On one of the threads someone posted this from I believe the ZZ cream website called demodex solutions which tells you what you can expect week to week with treatment which I will put at the end of this post. Actually they have a lot of good info on their site so check it out here.

   So the reason I went with tea tree oil is simple really. First, I already had some, second I didn't have to order it from overseas and it kinda creeped me out that they won't tell you ALL the ingredients in the ZZ cream, they say ancient Chinese secret or some crap like that. (but the ZZ cream has good reviews!) I didn't want to do the borax because it just seemed so harsh, like using ajax on my face or something. And I did order the sulfur in the form of nu-stock. It is really hard to find a product that has a high enough sulfur content that it would actually be beneficial. My nu-stock comes today but I didn't want to wait that long to get it to start treatment so I went ahead with the tea tree oil and here we are today. I might bust out the nu-stock for the next two weeks....maybe.

  So with that being said, I KNEW that there would be setbacks, I knew I would break out again, I knew it was coming. That doesn't mean I have to like it! Yesterday my skin almost looked pretty! Almost. It was the best it had looked since I got back from California. And then I woke up today. Now don't get me wrong, it still looks way better, but it's a step back from yesterday. I am trying to think if I ate something, or was around something that might have triggered it but I can't think of anything. I really need to start keeping a food/face journal. But even so usually if I eat something my face doesn't agree with, it lets me know right away.

  Anyways, today I woke up and it really isn't bad, just not as good as yesterday so it made me blah. But my face was a little more red, and I had two BIG pustules and I have a big pimple under my lip on the right and another on the left half way between my lip and chin that are just being persistent for some reason. (that is one of the ways I can tell the difference in pustule and pimple, pimple is deeper under the skin and stays around a lot longer). I am not calling it a set back, but my face would react like this on a day where I have to go meet a bunch of new people. BTW I just had sushi and I don't think my face likes soy sauce, I can feel the flush coming! At least I don't eat it often. Okay so here is the week by week that I saw posted for the ZZ cream that I am guessing will apply to my face also and after that I will post today's pictures.

Week 1:
Itching begins to subside and your skin becomes calmer. In addition, preexisting pimples and bumps begin to shrink and dry.

Week 2-3:During this period, you’ll experience the most severe breakout of the entire treatment. Your skin will become more dry and clusters of bumps similar to a mosquito bite might surface in affected areas. Don’t become alarmed or disgruntled during this difficult time. If you experience a breakout, it’s due to the dead demodex mites under your skin. As their bodies decay, the demodex produces bacteria inside the follicles of your skin. Once the bacteria is gone, the bumps will disappear and healthy skin will be revealed.


Week 4:Noticeable improvements to your skin will become apparent.


Week 5-7:You’ll experience a series of light rashes and breakouts during this period. It won’t be nearly as bad as the initial “die-off” stage during weeks 2 and 3, but it might seem like a setback (it’s not). These breakouts are caused by the decaying demodex mites that recently hatched from the eggs of the demodex parents killed weeks prior. After this group of offspring are eliminated, you’ll begin enjoying clear and healthy skin.


Week 8:A treatment of 90 days is recommended for total elimination of the demodex mites, but after 60 days, you’ll begin reaping the rewards of your treatment. You’ll start receiving compliments from family and friends on account of your bright and healthy new skin. This is when you know you’re rounding the final stretch.


Week 9-12:Even though your skin looks and feels completely cured, continue the treatment for 12 weeks.


Week 13 & Beyond:Although a 90 day course is recommended, it’s important to complete maintenance by applying the demodex treatment 2 times per month. This ensures no new overgrowth of demodex mites and it keeps your skin in optimal condition so you can continue enjoying bright and healthy skin.














Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Last thought before bed.

   So I have been wondering, why is only my face affected by the demodex mites? If they are all over your body, why just the face? And for me why specifically just the lower half of my face. Then I started to think about it and maybe its not.

   So I also have hypothyroidism and polycystic ovarian syndrome or PCOS, which comes with its own array of annoying issues to do with my skin and hair. LUCKY ME! Anyways, I am not going bald by any means but my hair is thinner than it use to be and my scalp like my face has been dry the last few years and itchy and I would almost get little zits especially along my hairline. Again I attributed that to either one of my other issues, but maybe it wasn't, maybe it's the demodex.

   Also I use to have pretty bad back acne but with the oracea it went away and now what I was off of the oracea it was slowly creeping back but just a few spots here and there nothing like it use to be. Now that I have been using the TTO shampoo, conditioner and soap, my scalp has been LESS dry and itchy and the spots on my back are healing and clearing up.

  So maybe these other issues that I always assumed were caused by my thyroid or pcos was really mites. I guess I will see. Also reading back over this, I realize how attractive of a woman I sound. Especially with all of those close up pictures of my busted up skin and double chin. LOL.

   One last thought, hypothyroidism and pcos seem to go pretty hand in hand. Not every woman that has one has the other but it is pretty frequent. I know that there seems to be a theory that it is an autoimmune disorder, I wonder in rosacea isn't somehow linked in there. Like if I could find the cause of one and fix it, it would fix them all. Okay, good night. I have to go visit a bunch of pregnant women in the morning. 

Day 12

   Well it is day 12 and everything is still going good. When I woke up today I had about 6 tiny new p&ps. They will be gone by tomorrow. I am not really stressing about them or freaking out about them like I use to because it is just one less mite on my face and these come and go so quick now. Also they are really small and easy to cover.

   My face is noticeably less red and my skin is really healing now and my skin is starting to smooth out and the texture is really improving. The only thing is my face is really dry and flaky so I am going to cut back the tto to just at night since they are not active during the day anyways and I have put some shea butter on it more frequently. If I start to regress I will just add back the morning treatment too. Okay so on to the pictures! Oh and these are pretty spot on the the color of my skin now. Just a slight pink.

Day 12







Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Another confession. Sorry this is a gross one.

   So I have already posted pictures of my face in all out war with my skin, with no makeup, and close up, so you have already seen me ways I would never ever let someone in real life see me so I might as well admit to it all. It's safe to be open and honest behind a keyboard. I am a picker. I pick at my face constantly. I don't know why, and I know I shouldn't but I can't help it. I most of the time I don't even consciously do it. When I realize I do it I stop....most of the time. My mom even today at the age of 33 will tell me to stop or smack my hand. LOL.

   I know that picking at it delays the healing of even causes scarring and me touching my face just introduces more bacteria to my face but I can't help it! I can't seem to stop. I was the little kid who always picked scabs. I have always hated the rough texture or the dry flaky texture. I know I do it a lot more when I am stressed and I tend to do it when I am zoning out watching T.V. or something but I just don't know how to stop.

   With my rosacea being mostly p&p my face tends to be really scabby feeling and dry. It doesn't LOOK scabby but it feels it and the more I pick, the more scabby it becomes. It's an endless cycle. If I could just leave my face alone and not freaking touch it I am sure it would heal ten times faster but I can't seem to do that. It's like a compulsion. So there you have it, I have never admitted it (but I am sure most people notice because I can't keep my hand off my face) I am a picker. Sorry that is really gross.


P.S. I am still drinking coke.....going to hang my head and shame and try not to pick. Night everyone. 

Itching.

   So when I woke up today I had a few more p&p, I had 5 in totally but still beats waking up to 20-30! Plus I now know that I p&p means a dead mite so victory to me!! My face all and all continues to improve, same thing 8:1 in the am, shea butter on dry spots and 1:1 at night plus the shampoo, conditioner and soap.

    I have noticed tonight that my face is REALLY itchy and so is my scalp and eyes. I am not sure if that is a good thing or a bad but I know it is annoying. Sometimes when I am in public I become super aware of my scratching and people looking at me, maybe I am just overly paranoid but whatever, what can you do? There is nothing worse than an itch you can not scratch. Sometimes at night my face will itch so much that I can't go to sleep. I don't know if anyone else deals with this but if so, how?! Seriously, email me, comment whatever but let me know how.

   My face in general looks better, a few of the p&p I have been getting are in areas I never got them before, high on my cheeks, my nose and forehead. I usually just get them around my mouth and chin but I guess with me treating my whole face they are dying off on my whole face. It's so weird to me how they have always been in a concentrated area, I wonder why. Also why I don't have the same reaction on other parts of my body.

   Ok well on to the pictures, today I took pictures in two different lights so you can see the progress. I am not really sure which shows it better so I will just post both! You can see how faded the red is and how it is more of a pinkish tone. Now the texture is my biggest problem, it's really hard to hide the texture with makeup.

Day 11

 This was indirect natural light







These are direct natural light.